Meeting Josh, and Christmas season

Series exam progressing, but mind split between Josh's birth in Bangalore and the practice for the programme. The programme was on a Saturday evening, and I got myself a bus ticket to Bangalore for Sunday. Had it not been for my participation in the programme, I could have gone probably a few days earlier. The exams got over and the practices were going well. We also had the sounds and the instruments too for the last practice. This experience was very good for me. Not often had I got to be part of someone else's group. So, I got to learn a lot about stuff. Those moments are cherished.

The day arrived. There was some extensive sound check scheduled for the afternoon. Tennyson, sounds-man for all the major events in Kerala, possibly south-India, and also abroad, was the man for this event too, thanks to Sajan Achen. The event was held in the Sooryaprabha Convention Centre, Mannanthala. As I walked into the hall, I was surprised to see the lavish arrangements, the props on the stage, and the bright feel to it all. That must have cost much. But it was cool. There was this choir that came from Madras, to perform in this event. I forgot who it was, but the choir was named after a prominent film music director. The diocesan bishop, Abraham Mar Paulose Thirumeni was present, along with the vicars of all the parishes in Trivandrum (around ten, I guess). The chief guest for the evening was famous music director for Malayalam films, M. Jayachandran. The Trivandrum Centre Choir was the highlight of the programme, as it was made of 120 persons from all the parishes in the city. Members of the choirs and the Youth Leagues of all the parishes had come together to form this choir. Sajan Achen did a commendable job. They performed two of his songs - Oru Ponthooval Pole and Kurunnu Paithale - both were well received. They also did an English carol, in harmony. The choir from Madras performed some songs that weren't generally heard. They did an average job. I wasn't impressed with their performances, but I thought one or two songs were nice and unique.

The Trivandrum Centre Youth Music Band, of which I became a part (for the programme), performed around five songs. It was a new experience. We did an alright job. The feeling was great, to be part of the programme. I considered it to be a blessing, since there were many other deserving people who could do the job too. That was certainly one of the highlights of my four-year Trivandrum life.

Next day off I was to Bangalore to see Resmi, Geo, Amma, and Dada, and of course, most importantly, the new-born Josh. The post-birth period for Josh was a terrifying period for everybody. He didn't seem healthy, and was constantly being subjected to this certain kind of light, to avoid being taken out into the cold to face the sunlight (which was what is to be required). It was only later that it became revealed that he wasn't getting sufficient milk during the feeding. But once it became clear, certain things were done, and he slowly began to show improvement. That was a major relief for everybody. The moments of worry Amma would sometimes recollect later, when we think about his birth and the days in the hospital. I arrived early morning and took an auto to their place. Amma answered the door with baby Josh in her hand. Everybody was asleep. Josh would be taken care of in turns by everyone those days, and that time of the day was Amma's. He was (freaking) tiny. Resmi was wow! She became another person with the birth and everything, with the look, of course. But she did exceedingly well. Amma was forever with Josh, and Resmi had nothing to be concerned with. Even when at the hospital with the light and everything, Amma was the one with baby Josh. I spent just three days with them. But those three days were simply out-of-the-world days. A new member in the family - father, mother, grand-father, grand-mother, and uncle. I got to see how they clean him up, how they gave him medicines, applied cream and stuff, his baby clothing, and every other thing. I got to carry him couple of times, but he was just too tiny, that I'd preferred to simply see him than carry him. Those days I would wonder how every other being was once upon a time a tiny little baby. Amma would recollect the days when Resmi was born, and then how things were when I was born. I guess I'm a little more than 6 feet, and several years ago I was couple of centimeters long. I got to understand the differences between the times of our births and Josh's birth (not all of it, of course, but some things here and there). It was the day before I left that we began considering names. I'd be asked to find meanings of names that everyone had a liking to. This was a fun exercise. My folks would come up with biblical names and Geo would come up with some incredible (and funny) possibilities if those names were selected. Resmi and Geo would come up with some interesting names I found new world. I had one or two suggestions, which they did appreciate. But somehow, Joshua (the biblical connection) and Josh (the modern touch) came to be considered seriously, and yet again Geo came up with a good joke with Joshua which made us all agree to Josh. Thus, he was named Josh Rajan Geo. That day we had a great time with potential names.

The day to leave came, and I departed on a bus back to Trivandrum. I wished I could stay longer. My seventh semester university exams were scheduled to start a few days after I reached home. I had two exams first, then a ten day gap (for Christmas), and then the rest. My father had to get back to Dubai before the last week of December because of the end-of-year associated work at job. So he came to Trivandrum for a couple of days and then went back to Dubai from there. He arrived in Trivandrum after my first exam, and then left two days after the second exam. Those exams were RAC and GD. I dont' quite remember how it went. Those were major papers when considering the B.Tech. as a whole. Those were the days when the Youth League members would go for carol-rounds. The exams prevented me from going, and I was so looking forward to go after the GD exam. Carol-rounds are a very happening season for me. There's just so much fun. But that night, Dada wanted to take Babupapa and family, Shajipapi and family, and Dubai Ammachi and family out for dinner. I figured I should go with them. Sanichachan didn't come along with us, because he opted to go for the carol-rounds. I missed that night's fun. Dada left the next day (if I'm right); I'm not sure if I missed that night's fun too. But I did make it for the next few days' rounds. That was incredible! We'd been singing the same set of songs the last three seasons and I did get bored with it (like in season two itself) but the fun and joy compensated for that well. It was two years back when Linda brought her friend, Gibin (CET 2009), to our church to teach us some songs for the rounds. He did a good job, and those songs were very pleasant. It took us some time to gel with the songs, but at the end of that year, those songs were the only things that we knew. The same thing we'd repeat uptil the season in 2008. I didn't need the song sheet to sing from. I felt really happy in being able to sing alongwith the guys - Liben, Jerin, Nelvin, Nithin, Robin, Rohan, Ron, Renosh, Sam, Samchayan Sanichachan, Betsy, Linda, Sairachech, and everybody else. Those days of merrymaking also will be greatly cherished. Some of us were aware that we couldn't repeat this again, may be ever. I think we went to Kesavadasapuram and Mannanthala the days when I was there. It was during my exams when the group came to my house when Dada was there. I didn't think they did well, but it was alright. We made up for that after my arrival.

One of those days I went for the carol service at the Nanthencode parish. I'd been wanting to hear their carols and see how differently they did it. I went alongwith Sanichachan and we arrived just in time and yet got to sit (comfortably) right behind the chief guest for the evening (it was a funny little thing, we doing that; the church was actually filled with people and we saw quite a number wait outside since there was no place to sit). The evening began with a song performed by the tiny tots of the parish, and that was incredibly cute. Jyothis accompanied them on the keyboard, and he did a good job of it. The choir was trained by Sajan Achen for his songs, Ritchie (an old choir master of the CSI church (who once taught the choir in the Paruthipparra parish when my father was its member, several years back)), and another person (I don't know his name). The latter two dealt with harmony singing. They had a good mix of songs, and I was impressed with the way they held the programme. I remember that their soprano was just incredible and their combination with the alto was wonderful. Sajan Achen had Tennyson do the sounds for the evening. It went well. I also decided to not attend the Paruthipparra parish's carol service (a few days later), since I didn't seem to be interested with what it had to offer. I knew that my hatred for the choir was also the reason for not attending. I instead headed to the Peroorkada parish, for their carol service, which was scheduled on the same day. The carol service was disastrous. The sounds were horrible, the singing was horrible, and the arrangements were horrible (I probably forgot some other things that were horrible too). There was probably just one song that I did like. Sanichachan and I were glad we had to leave before it ended to catch up with the carol rounds that night. I kinda felt bad for Abraham Joshua uncle (the choir master there), since I know the man and have had the opportunity to work together with him earlier. A few days later for a marriage that was conducted at the Peroorkada parish (Amma's relative, I forgot who it was, but they were from the States, and K M Raju sir, my principal, was also there), we met up and he asked me what I thought about the carol service. I remember trying to mildly convey what I felt. He seemed down about the whole thing.

The Christmas season came to a close. The last few days of the year I worked on the preparation for the rest of the university exams.

Seminar, the Youth Band, birth of my nephew

This entry comes after a long break. I kinda feel the lack of order in the history.

November 2008 was the month that I delivered for the first time a seminar - in front of the class, and it included the Mechanical Engg. staff too. The topic was Carbon Capture and Storage (CCS), a very relevant topic with respect to the potential it possessed for mitigating the degradation of the environment by human activity. Mechanical engineers had much role to play in this field. But, comparisons with the rest of the class' topics revealed this one to be considered lightweight. But anyways, I believe adequate and possible efforts were taken in the run up to the presentation, and guidance seeked (that's not a word, is it?) from the staff. It seemed alright. And then the time arrived. The presentation went well, I suppose, and the questions were pleasantly answered, in the best manner. At the end of it, there certainly was a sense of achievement, since this was something of a dreadful thing for us all - the presentation, the time constraint, the questions, its answers, and the like, quite tense.

There were few very remarkable presentations, like the ones taken by Anshad (was it something to do with air-vehicles?) and Deepak (noise-suppressors?). There were plenty of moments filled with fun too, like the seminar taken by Achyuth (plant management), and some others. I don't seem to recollect them all, or the details, but those were real crazy Tuesday afternoons. At the end of the term, when the sessional marks were published (December 2008), it was known that I top-scored in the seminar with 91 marks. That was very pleasing to know. God's grace.

IELTS coaching began and it was going pretty alright. Realization that Ms Divya was indeed a qualified trainer occurs.

Earlier, in August, Sajan Achen (then Nanthencode vicar, and previously, DSMC-director), had given birth to the concept of the Trivandrum Youth Band, being the then president of the Trivandrum Centre Youth League. It was a novel idea. The band would take up the singing sessions of centre meetings and could involve in other Youth League activities (I supposed). I came to know that, being a group for the centre, it would have participation from the parishes that made the centre. I was told that the group requires not more than two from each parish, and an ideal total number could be 10 or so. Ezra (SCT 2011), Youth League member of Peroorkada parish and (I think) then secretary of the Centre, had called me up, to get me involved. The timing couldn't have been more bad. (This seems to be a very general occurance in my life actually: when it comes - all together, and when it doesn't - idleness.) Ezra wanted that Ann and I attend practices every Sunday with the rest of the group for a one-day conference, or something like that, scheduled for later in the year. I was disappointed that my busy schedule in the months of August and September ruled me out of the practices, and hence, the band. I spent a considerable time on the phone with Ezra convincing him of my inability to make it. I knew this was a bad loss. The group had some other talented people from the Nanthencode parish, as well as the talented Kripa (senior at college) and Neha from the Pattoor parish (both, children of Manoj uncle, one of the choir masters of the Dubai parish).

I needed a solution to this dilemma. Ann was game for the band. Half the solution. The practices for the Youth Fest were picking up pace, and I found thinking about the solution to be tough. I'd agreed with Ezra to send some one else from my parish. I spoke to Sanichachan, and sincerely wanted him to take this opportunity. But his medley's progress (of which I was significantly related) was not substantial, and work commitments and stuff were time-consuming. So Sanichachan ruled out. I turned to Anish (senior at college, and piano-whiz) and asked him to take this up. But he wouldn't. (Interestingly, all the above mentioned did form part of the medley.) The person had to be musically inclined, and the people I had contact with, just couldn't do it. Although he is the next person I thought of in that situation, he certainly was an apt choice - Sam Kurishadi - then in 9th grade, St. Thomas, and fits the musical bill. Informed him of the requirement, and assigned him to the task. Thus, Ann and Sam represented the Paruthiparra parish. He also was part of the group (and was quite a tenor) that performed the harmony for the Talent Fest (my event). Practices for the centre's programme progressed slowly. I just got few inputs on that from Ann and Sam. But after the Talent Fest, I somehow never thought about that.

Back to November. The centre's meeting was happening on a Saturday evening. It was the Marthoma Youth Summit, and particularly was called the First Summit @ Nanthencode. Joe Joseph Achen was invited to give a presentation. The Trivandrum Centre Youth Music Band was unveiled at the beginning, and they led us through the singing. They did a very impressive job, both with the song selection as well as its handling. There was a great deal of quality in everything that I saw that evening. Too bad I had to leave when Achen was about to begin his presentation. (I was expected to play the keyboard for the evening service in my parish. Those opportunities came by rarely those weeks, possibly because of me not attending the choir practices, and the Christmas carol practices, and those were far spaced too, the opportunities, ie..) I remember getting back that night and entered a response on the Summit's webpage. That night I reflected upon the opportunity that had come my way, thanks to God. Not many people have opportunities come their way, just like that. I cannot take credit for that happening. I felt heavy and down, because of that. It wasn't pleasant. I kept thinking, how things could have been if I could partake in those activities too. But, I kinda believe, they did the job well, and was truly happy for them. I guess, I even thought of being considered for a second summit which was being planned after three months or so. That was something to look forward to.

Sajan Achen's other initiative, the Trivandrum Centre Choir's practices were happening at regular intervals for the big night - God's Own Night - scheduled the first weekend of December. Members of my parish's Youth League were taking part in it. It was after one of my tuition classes near Statue (for RAC / GD, at Balakrishnan sir's) that I happened to see a missed call from Kripa. I was surprised at seeing her call. Called her back. She was calling on behalf of the band, and they wanted to pull off few songs for God's Own Night. They wanted me to take part in it. This time too, there were some difficulties. Resmi's due, my series exam, and the event happened to be scheduled nearby. I tried real hard to not make this hard on me, by avoiding what can be avoided - which again turned out to be, me not being part of the band. (When it comes, all together.) But this time, Kripa did insist. She made a couple of phone calls just so that I could agree to be a part of them. When it came to that, I had to give in. I went for their first practice one day directly after the tuition at Statue; that day it rained, I remember, not that it was of any consequence, but just. We had a productive session, Aswin Abraham Thomas (Nanthencode, lead man), Kripa (lead girl), Ann, Sneha-chech (both, alto), Jeevan (Sajan Achen's son), and I. I was the only newcomer to the group and the size of the group was reduced, compared to the time at the unveiling (I'm assuming for quality's sake). Aswin's friends, Jyothis (keyboard), Robbins (bass), and Alex (drums) were also taking part in this. But they showed up on the last practice. There was one unknown song (Its Christmas Time), and the others familiar. I got to know the people better through this outing. Jeevan (then grade 11) and I sang the same part, and I was very fond of him, and his singing. I guess we gelled rather well. Sajan Achen dropped in to check on us. He seemed tense, but it wasn't bad. We had two more practices, of which one was with the sounds and everything. It was shaping up well.

Resmi's due was sometime at the end of the first week of December. My folks had booked a ticket to Bangalore on 2nd. I wanted that I go to Bangalore after my series exam, by which time it would have been the end of the week, and I'd be there to see baby Josh (of course, the name was decided on later). But God executed a varied plan. Josh arrived November 30th. Knowing that, my parents boarded an earlier flight, on 1st. My series were scheduled during the days to follow; and I couldn't have the excitement in all its color. Sanichachan happened to be in Bangalore with Vini and Sini-chech at the time. It was his text - 'Aap mama ban gaye' that broke the news. I was preparing for the exam then, and my folks ring me up to update on the situation, and I spent the next hour or so informing all the relatives I could over the phone. That was fun, introducing nephew Josh to the world.

Despair

October 2008 began on a note I had uptil then never experienced. I went through a week-long mix of sadness, loneliness, disappointment, anger (mild), detachment, dejection, and the like. I realized a lack of sense of purpose and initiative for any kind of work. Productivity hit an all time low. I knew all the while that post-Talent Eve 2008, I would go down into some kind of a mess; but never would I have guessed the intensity with which it hit me. You know, there was always some activity or the other which I immersed myself into during the weeks leading up to the the Talent Eve. Sometimes during those days, I would alert myself to find something significant to direct my energies so that the switch would not be bad. But I guess it was indeed a big deal to me (as it certainly was for many others also).

I did have the Pooja-holidays to look forward to. Earlier in some committee of the Youth League, I learnt of a picnic that was being scheduled for the Pooja-holidays. That would have been exciting. But somehow it got cancelled. I think there was some other activity lined up for the holidays instead. Also, after the Onam holidays, guys in my class started planning out a trip for the Pooja-holidays. I was looking forward to that too. Kiran (my classmate) was the man behind the trip. There was a division in opinion within the class. The plan was to cut (bunk) class a day or two before the holidays. There were some who couldn't join the group. So there would be a problem of some getting attendance and the others not. I so wanted to go as this could probably be the last time. By the end of September, there were around ten or so who joined the group. I wanted that everybody join and that we go together. But there were quite a lot who couldn't commit, which was disappointing. I decided to not go only because there were a lot who couldn't go due to various reasons. I told myself that the guys would have a good time and everything, but it wouldn't be as much as when the 52 of us go together. There were twenty-three of them eventually that made the trip. They came to known as Kirru's (Kiran's) 23. I think the places they went to included Ooty and Wayanad. They had a blast. We heard of it when we called them up on their trip. The pics they took also were cool. The rest of us wished we'd too had been with them.

Decision on higher studies (happened somehow) was taking shape. UK was the destination, and I needed to appear for the IELTS as part of the requirements. Headed to the Chopra's, Chalakuzhi. Ms Divya attended to me, and was very nice to me. I don't think I thought the IELTS to be a simple affair, which explained why I joined a 10-session preparatory class with her. The average performance in the mock test (which I think was fabricated) aided the decision. I wanted to appear in December for the test, and have my application(s) sent out in January. Classes began November. I started my alliance with the Chopra's in pursuit of the higher-studies goal.

Towards the end of the month (I guess) I had planned on conducting the S5 Moscars, which couldn't have been conducted before the S5 university-exams (should have been conducted ideally May-June). Sandeep wanted the certificate distribution of the (er., his) Mech Open to be held in conjunction with the S5 Moscars. So, this was to happen someday after class, of course. But on that day, during the lunch break, there was a fight that involved few of my classmates who were in the Civil Engg. building. It became ugly, as anyone would have expected, since it involved the senior-most Mechanical Engg. batch. Although we agreed that we got some, we certainly did give them more than they asked for. Mar Baselios College of Engg. and Tech. haven't witnessed much fights (I'm guessing, in our time, possibly, the number was less than 4). There was a heavy feeling during the hours after the lunch break. Sensing the possibility of the resuming of the fight at the end of the day, the Mechanical Engg. staff immediately diffused any kind of negative incidents. That was a precautionary step. The conducting of the Moscars was dropped, obviously. As I exited the campus, I saw coming towards the college gate the Civil Engg. guys along with what I thought to be goondas. One among them, the father of the main hit guy, on seeing Sabari (a classmate, and one of the lead guys in the fight) exploded. I'd never seen anybody go as wild. But even in the midst of this, Sabari seemed composed. This was a moment when all hell should have lost control. The tense situation was somehow put off (don't know how). Sabari did give back an adequate amount of reactionary dialogue. [One too many times, I'd seen a Mohanlal in Sabari. Not just a certain kind, but many kinds that he'd portrayed in the movies.] A day or two later, during the suspension meetings, I got to meet Sabari, and I expressed how amazed I was at his ability to handle that situation. I suppose it must have been his past and the experiences he's had. Few of the involved were suspended and some given lighter penalties. This incident told us to take greater caution in the future. Being final year students, it came hard on us. The issues died away somehow.

I'm assuming there wasn't anything else that mattered to be entered here. But the fight and the ensuing events were certainly stuff that will live with us.

Practicing fun

September 2008 was a terrific month for me.

Let's start on the academic front (that which I left out for my August 2008 blog). We had few newcomers to the college and some who weren't all that new who were taking subjects for us this semester. Joby Yeldo (SCT 2008 passout) and O. Rahul (TKM 2008 passout) were taking Refrigeration and Air-Conditioning. This was the beginning of a very different yet cool students-teacher relationship. Gas Dynamics, one of the toughest subjects in our four-year period, taken by the tough Rajesh sir, whom we refer to as Puththanpaalam Rajesh (who is a highly rated criminal in South India, and has a similar frame as our sir's). Because of him, we weren't overly concerned how it would go for us. There was a great deal of trust and respect for him. Design of Machine Elements -II was taken by Vinod sir. He breathed new life to this subject that formed a continuation to the first part that was taken by Srikanth sir in the previous semester. It felt good to be in his class. Metrology and Instrumentation was taken by our staff-advisor, Pradeep sir. He was ok. A part of this subject was taken by the 6-foot-4-inches tall, Krishnan sir (SCT 2008 passout). This was the coolest person who taught us. He'd always need a tag to pass off as a college-lecturer; for otherwise, not a soul could guess. It's got to be the Thironthoram slang that nailed it. Industrial Engineering was taken by the ever-tireless Venkatesh sir. His hours were spent very efficiently, by him as well as by us. He would take class as though the world would come to an end in a definite amount of time. And we used our time in all sorts of activity, of course, nothing dealing with the subject. We had an elective this semester. Half the class opted for the Marketing paper (Venkatesh sir again) and the rest half (in which I fell) took Plant Engineering and Management which was taken by Remil sir. He kept saying there isn't much learning to do and that he could finish teaching real quick. At the end of the semester we realized that it wasn't as simple as he made it out to be. But it was alright.

Late August we were given instructions on the conduct of the seminars we had to take. The topic could be anything which would interest a mechanical engineer. We were encouraged to take up new innovations and inventions as these could enlighten our faculty as well as inspire us. Luckily for us, the order to be followed was the class roll numbers. In other branches, we came to know that they had lots to decide who'd take the seminar. With our arrangement, there was always a sense of definiteness for all. We had seminars every Tuesday. Around five or six got to present their topics each session. This enabled us to determine the approximate date when each of us would have to present our topics. Another advantage we enjoyed was that we needed to get approved our topic a week in advance of our presentation day.

So we took it real easy. My number was 34, which meant that my turn would come up some time in November. But I didn't want to worry about the seminar then. So I thought of figuring it out for me during the Onam break. I spent some time then searching for some topic that interested me. I came across many related to the automobile industry, but nothing I felt much about. Value engineering seemed interesting. It happens to deal with management aspects. Although not technical in nature, management certainly falls into a mechanical engineer's jurisdiction. I seemed on the path to settling for this. I was hoping to seek Venkatesh sir's guidance in preparing for the presentation.

Classes reopened after the break and the first batch came up for the presentation. It was a fresh experience for the rest of us, as we just sat in the conference hall and heard out our own classmates go up and take seminars on interesting topics. It was new to them too. But they did a fine job. What made it exciting was the question-time that followed each presentation. I think Ajit I. (one hell-of-a-guy, classmate) blew it off completely when he answered Raju sir's (K. M. Raju, the then head of the mechanical department and principal of the college) questions. Every member of the teaching staff would attend our seminars if they were free. The faculty would be seated in the front row of the conference room, and us guys in the the rows behind. It was surprising how well many of the guys took the seminars.

It was during one of those days when Jagajith (a good friend and classmate), if I'm right, pointed out to me that value engineering (the topic I had selected for my seminar) is part of the Industrial Engineering subject, taken by Venkatesh sir himself. There was a clause in the whole seminar thing: the topic should not have anything to do with the syllabus we followed. The funny thing was, value engineering was taught in class a day or two before the Onam break. I was glad that this became known to me then. Search for a new topic was on.

It was some time just before the Onam holidays or so when our project group went to the VSSC library to seek a one-month pass (or anything longer than a one-day pass) to use its facilities. This way we could utilise our Onam holidays in preparing the literature survey of the project report. We were looking forward to it. I don't know if it was fortunate or unfortunate, but it didn't turn out to be so. On reaching the PRO, we were told that they were not authorised to issue such passes, and that we needed to get the clearance directly from the librarian. We spent quite some time at the office. Then we were allowed to enter the library and tried to get things sorted out. It was wrong of them to have done this to us, because I had been told by the people at the front desk of the library (who had consulted with the librarian) that the one-month pass can be issued if processing is done correctly. On enquiring with the front desk this time, they informed us of a new system which allows only those who were doing their project at the VSSC and those who have a direct relationship with a VSSC-employee would be issued such passes. We were told that we could continue availing the one-day pass system but in moderation.

So we discussed it out and decided that we use that day completely in collecting the possible amount of information and then returning later if a need arises. Luckily, on this visit, we stumbled upon a book that dealt specifically with the material we had to handle - Nimonic 263, a high-temperature resistant Nickel alloy. The VSSC library had certain policies. One of the tougher ones was - because the library won't allow the taking of any of its books - the photocopying of a page costs five times what it costs in a regular shop / library. This was a measure to ensure that the practice is discouraged and in the process, the books remain in good condition for longer durations. We didn't have another choice, so we opted for the photocopying. It took quite some time, and certainly quite some money too. We thought, this way, we would have all the information needed and just had to work with it. A return would not be required. This time when we left the library, it felt different - maybe because we didn't see ourselves returning or possibly the sense of achievement was overwhelming. That was the progress we made on the project front.

For quite some time now (over the past few months) I had been collecting information from the web on the various universities offering Masters programmes in the US and the UK. It was an eye-opener when I came to know the number of universities that offer the course in both countries. Some of them looked very exciting. Deciding which side of the Atlantic had not yet been made. Cost, duration of the course, and uncertainties in procuring visa, made the US less favoured. Quality of education and value of the degree was certainly US' strong-points, but the UK wasn't bad at all, in those respects. My mother had slight apprehensions in sending me to the US. I guess these caused a shift in my thinking.

Now onto the Talent Evening. During one of the earliest practices for the medley (I think at Ann's), Betsy (a good friend and batchmate at college) had enquired which song it would be for the group (the item I took responsibility for). That's when it dawned on me that the song had not yet been decided upon; the first practice for the group was scheduled for a day or two later. For the first practice, there was quite a number that turned up. As usual, the girls outnumbered the boys. This was a major problem in the Paruthipara Youth League. participation from the boys side was never strong. There always was a need for pushing them forward, which was tiring sometimes. Before we gathered together at the church for the practice, I was being asked again about the song. Because I hadn't figured it out still, and also since the group was inexperienced to do the kind of thing it was to do, I thought of indulging in a session entirely on exercises.

I had made it a point to pray before and at the end of every practice (by a different person), so that the group develops a sense of togetherness and belonging, and that God's grace is needed in everything we set out to do. After the first prayer that day, I broke the news that we wouldn't be getting into the song that day. There were instant voices of questioning. The thing was, when my mother had visited me in June, she had given me two songs and said that they were very nice ones and that I could present it on some occasion. Both were songs that I didn't know. So I had to play it out and see if one was better than the other. I guess, I didn't have the time for that before the first practice. I figured out one of them and it seemed good. Later, during one of our medley practices, i asked Anish to play out both songs for me. The one I had figured out earlier seemed better than the other one when he played them. So deciding was made easy. The song was 'Paapikkai Ullorurrava'.

The task on day one was simple and primary in nature - get the group to go through a range of exercises and in the process separate them in to the four parts of the harmony. There were just around five of them or so who were used to singing in the Church-choir. The rest had no such history. So often, it would not be a pleasant affair.

Certain elements (read Betsy and Linda (a nice friend and batchmate LBS, but not that nice when in the group)) in the group made life miserable for me. In a fun way, of course. But some times it just exposed me. Uptil then, I had always seen Ann singing the alto, but this time I wanted her to sing the melody. Eventually, it turned out that the alto included a bunch of girls with no one who could lead from the front. So they needed an extra amount of care (read, in the right sense). One of those early days, Tina had shown up for practice. Now, similar to Ann's case, Tina was always associated to the soprano. But because of the lacking of a leading voice, I decided on putting her to the task of handling the alto. Not the best of decisions, but an alright one. We could certainly count on her on leading the alto.

The guys were simpler to handle other than their talking we had to up to. The tenor was handled by Anish, and they seemed alright, except for the few 'vellhees' that fell off Liben's mouth. Sam and Jerin were the others. The bass was my portfolio. I had a good input from the choir's assets in Jerry, Linoy, and Jithin, along with great support from Rohan and Nelvin.

We had few practices before the Onam break and the rest after. It was totally fun. It was a big learning experience for all of us, especially me. I had a very good time teaching the group and spending time with them. There were many things I had picked up from the nearly month-long journey. Managing the group and the time that we had was the challenge that had to be faced. By God's grace, both was made possible. Progress in the harmonising was not happening for quite some time - something that was expected. But it was just a matter of time when things would fall in place. And it did just that. The group didn't fail me and we kept building on that.

After the Onam break, many other events' practices took pace. The medley's practice also happened simultaneously. This too showed very little progress for a long time. We required Anish to figure out for us the harmony of all the songs, which he did very well using his Sibelius software. Figuring out our parts itself was tiring. As in every harmony, the melody singers are the lead singers, and the song is carried by them. Betsy and Soumya (friend, my junior at college) were not easy to handle. Sanichachan and I spent a considerable amount of time on getting them to sing correctly, and then to sing well. Sanichachan wanted the medley to open with Joel (Ginuchan's (relative, great supporter of Youth League's activities) son) singing and the rest of us humming. That too was not an easy task. I did my bit by figuring out the scales of each of the songs, the switches, the instrumentation, and the like. I felt all our combining sessions were fun and hilarious. Most of them, probably, all of them, were struggles. Each of our parts needed great deal of concentration. If we lost it anywhere in the act, we'd have to struggle to get on quickly. But we certainly did get our act together on the eve of the big day. It was relieving.

All the events were making progress a week towards the big day. The group, medley, margam-kali, skits, and every other thing. It was then that I saw the main skit of the programme. Sairachech and Samchan (friends and great assets of the Youth League), gave excellent performances in their roles in the skit. There some totally funny situations during the practices. We all had fun watching them. Frustration began to set in on the day of the rehearsal with the sound system. Sam (good friend and Ann's brother) had come in from Bangalore, and had agreed to help with the sounds. That was quite an evening. There were lots of people in the church and a lot of mics, wires and associated stuff. There was a lot time spent waiting for the sounds to be set. I found it unproductive, and had a feeling of uncertainty with regard to the sounds on the big day. You know, there was a great deal of hard work put in during the practices, and if the sounds don't turn out to be alright, then however well you perform, the output just won't be well received. I was heavily concerned with that.

The day had come. It was a much anticipated day for the Youth League. The sound system was to be set up after noon and the medley and the group were scheduled to have a sound check two-hours before the start. Unfortunately, there were just few from the group. So that didn't go well. We did have one for the medley. That was alright. The sounds were then just being figured out. I was well aware that we wouldn't have certainty in terms of balancing and blending voices and parts. I came back home, took a shower, and then laid back and listened to some good music. I was in need of some unwinding. The stress had taken quite a toll. I didn't allow thoughts of the evening to creep up. Then I prayed for a while. Human efforts all a waste if God's grace is not seeked. There were several things that we couldn't control. I wanted that all the programmes for the evening were well done and well received, without glitches. There was always a part of me worrying about the failure of power during a performance, especially the group's song and the medley. We had the instrumentation programmed. It was a potentially awkward situation to be in. But, I guess, the calmness that I instilled within me during the prayer helped a lot.

The Talent Evening was on. The events progressed well. Paulose Thirumeni graced the event with his presence. There were Achens from neighbouring parishes too, including Sajan achen (a well-wisher, I think of him as one who works through music). The song was sung well. About the output, well, I was certainly not pleased. The group, of course, did fine; which was a big deal to me. It was a collective effort and the achievement is theirs. Some of them sensed my not being pleased. But anyway, they were relieved of the tension to sing their parts in front of the packed-church. We moved on. I happened to meet Sajan achen outside in between. He had to leave. He told me of a programme for Christmas that he wanted to do, wherein all the choirs from the Mar Thoma parishes in Trivandrum would get-together and form a big choir and present few songs. He asked me to be a part of it. It was an intereseting prospect. But I did mention to him of my uncertainty to be a part of the plan. This was because the programme was scheduled at the same time as Resmi's delivery. Also, if ever my exams were then, then that would be a problem. But any way, I did agree to see if I could be a part of this event.

The evening was still on. The dances went fine. The guys' drama was going alright. The medley was coming up. Things were going well. We all had a gooding feeling about how everything was shaping up. The medley went much better than we feared, and it was well received too. We felt the audience's appreciation. That was nice. It was a good feeling.

I know I'm not able to completely express the joy of involvement we experienced together, but it certainly was enriching for us all. I remember allowing myself to wonder (during the evening) if we could go through the same thing all over again for the 2009 edition. Many of us would not be around as we'd probably have left the place.

Song scouts

I forgot to mention how exciting were the early days with my new TV. Two important events I had the opportunity to watch live. The first was the Euro 2008 final between Germany and Spain. I sat up to watch the game but then soon realised that watching a football-match was not my cup of tea, especially when I was tired. I actually slept off some time before half-time. That was totally lame. I anyway caught up on the game in the news later. The second was the more significant. Rafael Nadal vs Roger Federer - Wimbledon Final. I am a fan of Roger Federer, and although I do not wish to glorify people easily, I didn't mind agreeing with the way the media did so of him, prefixing His Highness/Greatness to his name. I've kinda always believed that Roger Federer was a good man. There was a great deal of respect for the man and his game. I sat through the whole match that night and didn't fall asleep. I just couldn't, for it was quite a match. Rafael Nadal played excellently and deserved the win. I felt sorry for Roger that he'd lost what belonged to him to a great foe on the court. It certainly must have been a very difficult time for him. I think the failure occurred at a good time in his career, for if it had happened earlier, I'm guessing he wouldn't have achieved what he has in present time. To me he is without doubt the best player the tennis world has seen by judging under several criteria, and not simply the wins and the slams. Watching the game on the big screen was a very new and exciting moment for me, and I enjoyed every moment of it, except the moments when Roger lost.

It was on 6th August that Aimee was born. Aimee is the baby girl of Vijoochan (my cousin), and Lesliemmama (his wife). For the birth, Suamma (my aunty) and Kummochachan (her husband) had gone to Bangalore. It was a very happy moment for them and also for us. Resmi was mid-way in her pregnancy at this point. Before leaving, Amma had asked me to not inform Resmi about the Neethu-episode. But I did around this time, I guess. She too was shocked and everything.

My sixth semester exams were still happening in the month of August. I had two exams (I guess) as per schedule and another one, the one that had been postponed. All went pretty well, I did feel better than how I felt after my fifth semester exams. That was good. I thank God for that.

I think it was some time mid-August when we had our Youth League's retreat to the Vyojana Mandiram. Ann and I were asked to take care of all the singing sessions. That we did, and had a good time. Actually it was a good outing for us all. The bus trip, the ice-breaking, the singing (action songs), the interesting class (George Behanan), and the interactions among ourselves as well as with the inmates of the place, all of it was very good and lively. It was nice to meet the inmates and share the time with them and sing along with them. After that we went to the Neyyar Dam, walked all over the place, played some ball, and the time was up. The Achens had to return back because of the evening service in Church. That was disappointing, we were just getting into the game.

Our seventh semester classes began towards the end of August. Final-year. Super-seniors. Responsibilities. We had no considerations for any of these. It was as though these had no bearing on us and it was like any other day to us all. We were relieved and excited that the exams were done with and back to classes. I had always had a great time in class with my classmates. There was always a lot to laugh about and do all sorts of stuff. It was funny actually that we all hated to go to class, but while in it, we simply forgot about that and enjoyed ourselves.

I guess, after my solo visit to the VSSC library, our project group visited the library a couple of times during July and August (with the letter from our principal). But we didn't use it during those visits because we just needed one-day passes then. We thought we'd use the letter to apply for a longer pass in time for our Onam-break. It was during the first visit as a group that I discovered that there were three more floors above the one I had visited on my own, with lots and lots of books, just like in the ground floor. The scans that we made during those visits were totally exhaustive. Actually, the sight of the books and their titles itself wore me off. We made very little progress those days. The visits didn't seem to do the good we so hoped it would.

Some time then there was a committee in the Youth League to discuss about the Talent Fest. This was its birth. The beginning of a special period for me. This was to be an event wherein the Church is invited to an evening of celebration of the talents of its youth. So there was a lot of discussion on the kind of programs that can be pulled off and the like. There was a good exchange of ideas. I signed up to present a song with a group of members, not knowing what it is that I was doing. Simply raised my hand. I also informed the committee that Sanichachan would take care of another item (medley), and that I'd arrange for an instrumental piece with Anish (a friend and good pianist).

Sanichachan's medley item was what we began work on immediately. There was discussions among us as to who should join us to handle the melody (soprano). Sanichachan wanted something like a quartet, a small group. Since alto would be Ann's, bass myself (the truth is, there wasn't anybody else with a good voice we could have, so the settlement), and Anish and Sanichachan with tenor. We agreed upon Soumya but we knew that she couldn't carry upon the melody all by herself. So we then considered Betsy (another beginning). We didn't want to get into it hastily so we discussed some more on her joining. We eventually thought we'll give it a try. Not the best decision, I'd say. But nevertheless, quite a journey, I'll admit.

I think our first gathering was at Ann's one evening. Sanichachan would arrive late and asked me to handle the time. We started off on a major laugh that day involving Betsy. It was a very good one. (There was a good reversal too, on me, by her, sometime later.) At the end of the first two or three sessions we had with the group, it became clear to Sanichachan and I that we have a major task ahead of us.

We still weren't sure of the songs for the medley. Actually that didn't matter because it was certain to us that we needed to undergo a lot of excercises to make oursleves (Betsy and Soumya specially) fit enough to carry the songs. But Sanichachan and I did do some song searching. He came up with suggestions and I tried to see how it would fit into the scheme of things. Slowly, things started to fall in place. Sanichachan developed a plan for the whole item.

Shock, disbelief, upset, irreversibilitty

The first thing Amma and I did together in the month of July was visit my grandmother. It was a fun outing for us both. Ammachi is always fun to visit as she'll constantly try to feed you with all sorts of goodies. Its also fun to listen to the things she says. We had a good time.

The next day was the day that shook me up. Amma had asked me to go over to Shajipapi's (my uncle living few steps away) and give some of the stuff that she'd bought them. At the door, when I had given the bag containing the stuff to Shylammama (his wife), I noticed she was not her usual self. Shajipapi called out to me from inside and asked me to get my mother. He too seemed disturbed. I rushed back and brought Amma along. Shylammama broke the news to us - Neethu (their daughter) had run away with this guy she met couple of months back. This happened the day after my birthday get-together at my place. It had been three days when we were informed. They tried to inform earlier but couldn't get us. She broke down crying heavily and both Amma and I was shocked with disbelief. This was a major upset and had deep consequences and affected many things and persons on multiple levels. I hadn't seen Shajipapi in this state ever before, so lost. We then came to understand many things about this that my other relatives knew of earlier. The relationship had come to light quite early in its progress. What disappointed us all was that the guy was of another faith. Attempts were made by several persons and on different levels to put sense into the girl's head. Early June it seemed that the efforts were paying off, and she agreed to bring an end to the relationship. But that was just so that she could get everyone to stop forcing her to end the relationship. The guy worked in a small shop and he was my age.

Efforts were then made to stop them from registering their union. Those days were real intense with lots of emotions and thinking of ways to stop them and consequences of various actions. Nobody had seen her since the day she took off. Her parents were deeply worried. Those days I heard stories of girls who'd run away in similar cases return back after a couple of days because things didn't turn out the way they'd hoped. So that helped slightly. We just hoped and prayed that Neethu would also return back that way. She was just too dear to us all, a girl with immense energy and potential. Because of this, it became clear that her education will be affected and that there's a possibility that she wouldn't complete her B.Com. That was sad, as she was academically alright and the degree would have been significant.

There was then an episode that occurred in a police station where persons from both sides were present. Amma had accompanied Shylammama to the station. That was when they had seen Neethu after the run-away. She made it clear that she didn't want to return. Their union was legalised. Nothing could be done. She made her decision clear and she was legally of age. We had to return back. The family had to deal with many things because of the incident, the toughest being the humiliation that this brought on. It certainly was tough. Their only child, their daughter, had removed herself from her family, from her home, and gone to some guy she met couple of months back.

I've thought about the whole incident for quite some time since then. It's certain she was thinking - it's just that the thinking was directed along a path that seemed to her to be more positive and promising than the life she had lived uptill then. She could have been influenced to think about the better life she could have with him, which her family (she must have believed) was incapable of offering. I'm also certain that I wouldn't know what was going on in her from the very beginning till after the run-away; only she'd know. Several elements work in varying degrees to cause a person to behave in a certain manner. These can include even events and incidents in a person's life that occurred earlier, that we wouldn't suspect had a role in causing this. I'm just saying that laying the entire blame on her for her actions will not prevent similar incidents from occurring.

This incident is their story now. They're dealing with it now. Few months after the run-away if someone asked her if she thought it all alright, my guess is she'd actually feel sorry for betraying her parents and wished if there was some way to reverse the events. She got into a mess that getting out of would result in a greater mess. A helpless situation. Irreversible. This may be a reason why the story goes on. May also be why it is preferred to go on this way.

On other stuff : Amma was leaving second week of July back to Dubai. Time flew away like crazy. Most of the time we were concerned about the run-away. I feared the dreaded-void that could be created when someone you love (in this case, Amma) leaves. Experiences from the past have taught that this void is a terrible period for me. There is a great deal of loneliness because of the absence of the loved-person. This is an unproductive period. The void to me is also a costly affair. Idling occurs and I hate to have spent time with nothing substantial done. I even feel guilty because of it. Why I feared it is because ten days after the leaving of my mother starts my sixth-semester exams. And if a void sets in before these exams (like the previous time in January 2008), then that would reflect terribly on the results. That is certainly undesirable.

I set myself up to prevent the possibility of the dreaded. While I was at it, I was informed about the retreat for committee members of all organizations of my parish, and that my participation was required. I agreed because it allowed me to take my mind off other things for a while. It was an interesting outing for me. Every organization had to present an item. So the Youth League decided to pull off a skit. It was totally lame. But what made it interesting was the decision to cast me as the priest in the skit. That was even lamer. Kindly note that I have nil experience in acting (on stage). That my abilities in conversing in Malayalam leaves a lot to be desired was apparently ignored made things more interesting. I screwed up quite well and had people come up to me to congratulate me on my unconventional and weird performance. We had a major laugh on that one. The association with the Youth League was going to be a strong one, that will have a lasting effect on me. This outing marked the beginning of fun times with the Youth League.

I then got down to the serious business of exam preps. I had it going for me because the previous semester had it tough and bad on me and my GPA suffered. So I had to produce much better results. So there was genuine preparations. I thank God for all the blessings he's given for causing my preparations to progress without any hitches. The first paper got postponed to the following month. But the remaining occurred as scheduled. That was good. I thought the performance was certainly better than my previous exams. So there was a good feeling.

I can't seem to remember any other happenings from July 2008. If anything springs up, I'll add it.

What lies ahead . . .

Towards the end of the year 2008, I looked back and realised that there had been so many activities and developments since July. In this blog, I'd like to mention some of them. It can been seen in a way as a trailer for the reader and as a reminder for me.

July - the runaway leads to great disappointment and grief

- Renoy, an act apart - terrible performance, unconvincing as Priest

August - the retreat

- birth of the Talent nite

September - roller-coaster ride with practices

- harmonizing a bunch with no history in harmony

October - sheer despair

November - Family day celebrations

- Josh's arrival

December - Trivandrum celebrates Christmas in style

- Renoy meets Josh

Amma's coming!

The month began with the continuation of the intensive search for the right laptop. Those were truly crazy days with loads of laptop configurations around me. My mother was scheduled to leave for India by the third week of June 2008. So I should have found the right laptop before then so that she could buy it for me from Dubai. By around 10th or so, two developments occurred: me going for a Dell model (after consultations with Sanichachan), and my parents sending me a copy of two offers available at an outlet in Dubai for a Dell (another configuration) and an HP. Both these offers were good ones, but after checking with Sanichachan, I learned that the offer on HP was better. So we approved for its purchase and things were finally settled. It was a major relief.

In the midst of all of that, I had attended Primavera classes (at CADD Center), which took around 5 or 6 days. It was slightly complex and I quite don't think I'll have any use for it. Sonu (a classmate, who was with me for the Primavera classes) and I teamed up to do the project. We made substantial progress and were close to completing it, which was when our teacher (I think she was Ms. Preethi) broke our hearts by asking us to redo the entire project in CAPS. That was no simple affair as there was a great deal to type out. We didn't lose heart. We agreed to pull this off. But just when we began our work, we were informed our CAD Lab classes would resume in college the next day. Since then we hadn't had the chance to complete our project.

Prior to the Primavera classes, I think this was also the time when Jones had gone to Doha for the break, I had gone to the VSSC library. You know, the visit to the VSSC in Veli isn't simple at all. This visit would help me to understand the formalities our project group will have to follow to use the library there. The guards at the main gate, not easy to get by; the procedures at the PR office just beside the inner gate, another hurdle; shuttling between rooms in the office, the calls to the library, the approval of a pass to enter, the photo-taking for the one-day-pass - exhausting. But all of that seemed to disappear on reaching the building that housed the library. It was an amazing view from there - the trees and the ocean extending to the horizon was just beautiful. There was some kind of an exhibition with a number of large photographs of many cities taken from satellites put up in the space outside the library.

Went to the front desk and spoke to the persons there about my visit - college student, project group, need for material from the library, issue of pass, available options, and the like. The response was promising, so I agreed to do the necessary (which included a lot of paperwork in college seeking Principal's approval and the like). I was then allowed to take a look at the books in the library. This library is certainly a big one. I moved through a number of long aisles and saw so many books, some that had academic significance to engineering students (yes, even to civil, computer science, and information technology), and some that were very interesting relating to the vast field of space science. There was another section that had news relating to developments in the field occurring in different parts of the world put up on bulletins. Another section had international magazines on advancements in space technologies. There were so many tables and chairs for sitting down and going through the books in peace. I saw few employees making use of the library. That was when I actually got exhausted. There were just a great deal of information in there. On my walk back to my bike, I realised that the library in my college was probably the equivalent of just a single aisle that I saw in this one. That was quite a trip for me.

ANSYS classes started in college. Pradeep sir was teaching us. Classes went well and then came the tough part. There was a lot to print for the record-work and little time. Those were days when my patience was tested several times. But it turned out to be alright.

It was also during that time that Vinoochan (my cousin), Reenummama and little Nikhita [his wife and daughter (then two-and-a-half years old)], were in town. Vinoochan had completed his MBA at the ISB, Hyderabad, in April and had appeared for a couple of interviews and was awaiting its results. It was totally fun to be with them and little Nikhita. She was such a joy to spend time with. I also remember the prayer meeting we had at Suamma's and when I was asked to take her inside upstairs. It was fun, we had a good time, and I was feeling that I couldn't do any better. That was when she started to get irritated and it seemed that I ran out of all the tricks to restore the happiness and joy. One thing led to another and the situation became irreversible. The subject had to be transferred to her grandfather, Kummochachan. Peace was restored. But it was totally cool!

My mother went to Bangalore to spend time with Resmi. They had a good time. My mother had adviced her on several matters, I'm sure. Amma's fondness for Bangalore, and the Bangalorean way of life grows.

Amma touches down Trivandrum! This was no ordinary trip. With Amma was a, no - THE LAPTOP!, and also a big TV. You know, even then I never had a need for either. I reasoned with myself that I did a fine three years without these (it seemed unbelievable to many, sometimes, even to me); would these bring disappointing times or good times ahead for me? But anyway, she was here. I was looking forward to the days ahead. Signed up for a digital Asianet connection. Then applied for a BSNL Broadband Unlimited connection. We had a good time together. Then came my happy birthday. We decided to call home all our nearest relatives for dinner. It was a good gathering. Babupapa even shared with us from the Word.

Things went well in June 2008. That marked the end of the first half of the year.

Ananthapuri

It was some time in April 2008 when Resmi broke the news that she was carrying. Her due was around Dec-mid. It was a matter of immense joy to us all. Our parents were excited with becoming grand-parents, and me being uncle and the like. It was exciting. I guess my mother started planning her (June-)trip to be with Resmi and help her with stuff. It would be difficult to come twice the same year for my father, so he decided to come for the birth of the child.

Some time at the end of April or early-May, I was informed by my mother that Jaya aunty's (Jinu's mother) father had a stroke. The following day he was brought to a private hospital in Trivandrum. I was told to do everything to make them feel alright. Amil (Muthu) had informed me that he too would be arriving (from Tiruvalla) the next day. We met up around noon, had lunch and then set out for Ananthapuri Hospital, which was where appachan was brought. Jaya aunty's brother (who's also a priest) was the one who brought him along with Jaya aunty. Muthu and I helped them out with stuff and their accommodation in the hospital. Appachan was paralysed on his left due to the stroke. But otherwise he was alright, and with some treatment he could be made to regain his senses. Jaya aunty, her brother and Muthu and I, had lunch together in the canteen one of the days. We had a good time.

This was a different experience for me. There was a time earlier when I had visited a person from the Mar Thoma Parish in Dubai, who was ill, in this same hospital. It was, I guess, some 10 kms, from where I live. It was situated on the highway (bypass, actually). My drives to the hospital, the feeling while in it, the sight of a number of people there within, different kinds of illnesses, and the like, were all new to me. George-appachan constantly featured in my prayers those days. As also the other people from different other backgrounds, places, with different illnesses, and also the health-caregivers.

I also understood how important it is to be there for someone you love and to make them feel well in your company. These experiences showed me how significant was our relationship with Raju uncle, Jaya aunty and the family, and not merely friends. The love and fellowship our families share is certainly not something that can get dissolved easily. And I'm so glad about this.

On multiple occasions I've heard the respected Episcopa, Abraham Mar Paulose Thirumeni (hope I've addressed him rightly), use the name Ananthapuri to refer to Trivandrum. I believe, earlier it was called so that way. My trips to this part of Trivandrum was the first time I did so; so, it was an opportunity to see and learn new places in Trivandrum.

I think it was sometime in the third week or so May 2008 that we were done (partly) with our sixth semester classes. We would then return for classes (CAD lab - Inventor and ANSYS) only in June. I remember using my days then to go to a cafe and search out laptop configurations of all leading makers to prepare a list from which I can eventually select a laptop that would be bought for me. I was told that I would be gifted a laptop (or a LCD TV) for my birthday, for which my mother would be with me in Trivandrum. I actually felt there was no need for either, thinking that life was alright the first three years without these and I'd rather it remained that way. But anyway, I opted for the laptop. So the search began.

Sanichachan asked me what the purpose would be, and I told him that the intention is that it should be a tool with which I can work with my CADD softwares (Pro-E, SolidWorks and ANSYS). So he gave me a list of configuration specifics that I should look out for in laptop configurations. So I set out on the job. Each day I would take a book in which I would note down those laptops whose configurations matched with my minimum requirements. And then I would try to get Sanichachan to comment on my day's (hard) work during the evening. Sometimes I would chat directly with him, sharing specifications and company-links and the like, to get real-time comments and help too. It was a crazy period for me as I ate, drank and slept laptop configurations, all the while knowing nothing in computer stuff and associated literature.

[And O, actually, it was in Feb-2007 that I had joined CADD Centre to study these softwares. I totally forgot to mention about this in my Feb-blog. I was excited at the whole prospect of studying these cool applications and the various possibilities it offered in design and analysis. But as the classes progressed and months went by, I realised it called for a certain degree of involvement and dedication to achieve impressive things with these softwares. I understood I was lacking in it.]

Sometimes I would get back to my folks claiming that the model has been shortlisted. But then this model probably no longer existed in the market there. We came to a point when we were greatly impressed with a model with Dell India, and were close to sealing a quotation for it. It was also a time when we were feeling a kind of discrimination by the kind of great offers these same makers offer the American market and not us (in terms of customised configurations and corresponding prices). My search kept going on. It was crazy.

This was also a period of more thinking and questioning of study-in-US. I got to see the time-table (from the IMS-website) one needs to follow to make it for a September-intake. I understood that if I was considering doing it, then I'd have to start GRE-preps right away. There was the two-year duration and the cost - two factors that dissuaded me considerably. But I hadn't let gone yet.

On the project front: In May 2008, we (Jones, Rajesh, Sahal, and I) went to BATL to meet the guide the Brigadier had assigned for us - Mr. Gopalakrishna Pillai. It was quite an introductory session we had. This was the first time he was the project-guide of students from a self-financing college. Since he had negative experiences in the past because of the kind of students he worked with earlier from Government Colleges, he had a pre-conceived notion that we would tread a very similar path, if not worse. I think he was surprised to know that we had no suppl-ees at the time.

He spoke about the activities of the BATL, its significance and related stuff. We were very excited to be there. We wanted to know what our project was. He told that there wasn't any project that was waiting for us as such. He asked us to take a look at the many shops, machines and processes and see if there was something that interested us. That, we thought, was cool. We then set out for an unguided tour of the facilities at BATL. It was as though we were on an industrial visit. I think it was better than the ones we had during our fifth semester. We could understand so many things we saw and we related easily to the environment there. The machine shop, precision shop, fabrication shop - we visited them all. It was towards the end of our visit to the fabrication shop that we discovered a machine not used for quite a while that caught our attention. We asked someone nearby what it was, and learned it was an expander. This turned out to be the beginning of a nearly 12-month journey.

We rushed back to inform our guide that we found something we'd like to work on. On hearing that it was the expander, he was bemused. He asked what made us think that it was what we thought it to be. Actually the princple that it can expand a sheet of metal into the desired dimension was new to us. [We even thought that our project could be to repair the machine and bring it back from the dead, or something like that.] He thought about it, and asked us to meet him after lunch that day for a discussion.

He then said that it is not an easy task to pull off a job on that machine and that no one before had done a project on it. They themselves do a job or two very rarely on it. So if we were still up for it, that would be some thing. He said he'll take a look and get back to us on what our further course of action would be.

On our next visit, he let us know about how the project should progress and the production of the report, its contents, and the like. He asked us to begin work on the literature survey which constitutes about 60 % of the project work and report. He gave us a list of topics we needed to collect information on and get his approval to actually enter the next pahse, which is the actual project. He asked us to not stick to the information available in our textbooks but also check out other options. He suggested we visit the library at VSSC. It seemed alright to us. Sahal, particularly, made it seem like a task that needed no time at all. At that time, we were so looking forward to wrap the entire project up before the end of the year. That meant, completing the S8 project by the end of S7, the beginning of which started at the end of S6. Quite promising indeed.

That's pretty much the happenings of May 2008.

Badminton, sirs, project . .

There's an event I missed out for Feb/March. Towards the end of February, Sandeep, a dear friend of mine, had suggested conducting one more badminton tournament, a big one, doubles, with all 52 of us participating, and stuff. I politely backed out citing no sincere urge to conduct. Oh, just in case you didn't follow, it was I who'd conducted the first badminton (singles) tournament, Route 9's Championship for my class, S5 ME, October-November 2007. It was a big hit and I soon followed it up with another one, the NBA vs VBA tournament (doubles), but that turned out to be a source of conflict, though not of a serious nature. I helped out Sandeep, who teamed up with Swaroop as tournament - co-ordinators, to formulate the conduct of the tournament, which he had given great hype to. This tournament did turn out to be the only tournament conducted for the class wherein maximum participation was recorded. I think 48 of us played in the tournament. That's no small achievement. In March, when we got the tournament underway, and the schedules of the matches all set, we figured we'll have completed by April-end or May, more or less comfortably. But it didn't turn out to be. The Mech Open 2008, the tournament's title, also got another tag, that of being the only badminton tournament probably the world has heard of that lasted nine months. The final was conducted only in November 2008. But anyway, it was a fun filled event for all of us, and an opportunity for some great bonding.

Academically, two special highlights of the sixth semester also turned out to be opposites, in a way. The first subject of the sixth semester was Heat and Mass Transfer. It was taught by a newcomer, Rajesh sir. This was a core subject and was taught in a manner up til then we were not subjected to. It was fresh and also an exciting prospect to be in his class. His teaching was truly effective. The other subject was Design of Machine Elements-I, taught by Srikanth sir. Let's just put his teaching as purely non-effective. It had an impact that amounted to nothing. But he was a fun guy. Wait . . . totally forgot. Mr Venkatesh sir! How could I?? Mr. Venkatesh sir joined the Mechanical faculty end-Jan and hit it off on a quite a note. His ways were also certainly different. Never had we been subjected to a sir as sincere and extremely passionate about teaching and interacting with students. It blew us off then, and amazes me even now. He is indeed a dedicated person, but it's just that we didn't appreciate it sufficiently and grew increasingly intolerant of his ways. He taught me four subjects from my sixth sem to the eighth sem. Quite a ride!

April was also the time when I kept getting info on higher study options abroad from my folks and also form education-fairs I had been visiting. It soon became obvious that most agencies focus on almost every destination other than the US. Very few of them have links in the US. Also, visa is a hurdle they can do nothing about. 

Early April, the College Day was celebrated - a day wherein students come forward to present colorful programs, like songs, dance, and other creativities. Before the programs got into full swing, Sahal (a dear friend and classmate) and I happened to meet our principal standing outside his room. We spoke about quite a number of topics. I used this opportunity to seek his guidance on our project, which up till then we had made zero progress on. And O, I had already asked Jones (another pal of mine) and Sahal to join me for the project; it's a group activity. Raju Sir, the principal, brought out the name of a prospective newcomer to the Mechanical faculty of our college. This was Brigadier Jose, who had then just completed his assignments with the Army and was on the verge of accepting the exciting opportunity to become our HOD, or so i remember Raju Sir claim. That was also when he was asked to take up the position of GM (Admin.) of Brahmos AeroSpace Thiruvananthapuram Limited (BATL). Raju Sir, if I'm right, was an associate of Brigadier Jose. He asked us to contact him and see if he will help us out, in getting an opportunity to do a project at BATL. That was BIG news for us.

Did just as was told. Got BATL's number and called, asked for Brigadier Jose, and was connected. TRUE BASS. FORMALness personified. It gave you the creeps. But any way, got down to the introduction and that Raju Sir asked that we contact him, and the like; and also more importantly, the project. He was very kind and patiently heard me present the need. He asked for some time, as being new to the organisation, he just didn't want to do anything hastily. Two phonecalls later, green signal! We were asked to get a letter from college. It took some time. But the letter was obtained and delivered. I did it myself. Things looked set, like as though we're on a smooth cruise or somethin. He had also got us a guide who'll help us out with the project. We hadn't met till then. Our meeting took place in May 2008 (I guess so).

Towards the end of April, I believe, the end of sixth sem, we were presented the plans for our eight sem project. I remember Venkatesh Sir asking that the class be divided into groups of max 5. Projects could also be individual activity. But nobody decided to do go for that. Group formations occured rather swiftly and my group had just three - Jones, myself, and Sahal. There were a handful of guys in the class who hadn't gotten themselves into any group. Rajesh 32 (aka MGR, another classmate, but certainly unlike anybody else, in his mannerisms) was constantly pressurizing us to take him in. I just wasn't game for the idea. There were two reasons: we were asked to keep the number to preferrably three and max four by Jose Sir himself. 32 was not somebody we would want to do project with. He lived away from where the three of us were and didn't seem academically oriented. But then, his persuassion got us to agree to his inclusion. Besides, if anything, I took this as an opportunity to know him, and try to effect a change, a good one, in him. Close association with guys like us can bring about desirable qualities, or at least should have. It would have been quite a highlight in this venture.

Tha badminton matches progressed well. Thowfeeq (a good friend and classmate) and I formed a pair. We did rather well to progress to round-2, where our opponents were certainly dominant. We gave it all we had. It was great fun playing those days and certainly a joy playing with Thowfeeq.

Fests and plans for the future

You know, the period mid-Jan to mid-May is the college fest period. Colleges all over south-India (i guess so) conduct their festivals during this period. Mid-Feb to mid-March is the period when normally MBCET conducts Crossroads. But because of the crises and the issues, and the fights that occurred (both on- and off-campus), the management and the academic heads called off the conducting of the fest. So, March was a month for the first time in MBCET's (short) history that we witnessed no Crossroads. What made it heartbreaking (or so I thought it did) was that the Crossroads that should have taken place would have been conducted by the students of S6, which i represented then. And it was partly our doing that led to it being cancelled. The progress the guys had made since Nov-2007 seemed hugely promising to be the biggest and hugest fest Trivandrum had seen (probably Kerala's second best, after NIT-C's Ragam). It was depressing, since a great deal of effort that was taken by many students (special mention, my classmates: Akhilesh, Alen) had gone in vain.

Many of them got over the disappointment through various avenues. There was Ragam 2008; few from my class had gone. I wanted to return for the 2008 edition because Karthick was performing for the Pro-Show. I'm a fan of Karthick and love the attitude with which he performs. It's somethin I haven't noticed many others have/do. I didn't go; can't seem to remember exactly why. There was some reason. Then there was Broadband, a joint production of MBCET and IEEE. It was a two-day national level seminar/conference. I had gone for the inauguration by Infosys chief Kris (can't seem to recollect his name). It was a good speech. The opening day ended with the cultural evening. That was fun. There were some very good performances that night.

Higher study options - that was what was on my mind. Aerospace studies, masters, abroad. Where abroad was the question that needed an answer to take the right next step. The US was certainly a good destination, as it had such a rich tradition in education, and class and standard in the degree. The UK was certainly not behind; in fact, from some studies it is known that the US and the UK have nearly the same value when it comes to higher study-options. Australia also seemed promising, but the options in Australia are few; also when compared to the above two destinations, it was slightly behind. 

I settled for the US, at least, for the time being. This was probably because of multiple reasons. The movie-influence, i guess. Having seen lots of movies about Americans, the American-way of life, their lifes, the A-dream, and stuff like that, would make anyone go for it, without thinking too much. Besides, and more importantly, the quality of education is great and the degree is of high standard too; also i've got my own uncle and his family there (Florida), another cousin of mine, and other relatives and friends too.

So, to pursue higher education in America I need to satisfy certain requirements. GRE is one of them which requires much preparation. Thus, I began my search for an institute that offers good training for aspiring GRE-takers. You know, one needs at least 1450 on 1600 to be eligible for Ivy-League and other good universities. I visited some of the institutes in Trivandrum and learned of the GRE format, its associated info, and the like.

IMS seemed to be the right one, and I began calculating the process, after studying the calender about the process of studying and appearing for the GRE, the application procedure, and related stuff. I figured I'd join right away or in April and begin preparations and get set by October or so, which is the right time to appear, or so they claimed. After having completed that stage, i could then move on to applying to the universities i should have short-listed by then.

I seemed set on the right path. My folks were always supportive and kept getting all sorts of info regarding these important decisions for me. I had also emailed my cous, Vinod, in Florida, about my queries about the course, universities, life, and the like. He helped a great deal in the formation of my understanding about the system in the US.

My search was not just confined to the US; I had also made significant progress in finding suitable places in Australia and New Zealand. But, I think, those i did in April or so. Actually, I don't seem to remember the happenings of April 2008.

I'll work on that uptil the time I publish the next blog which is due in April.

A month that showed me probable future prospects

During our sem exams that were held in Jan, we were asked to pay a certain amount to make ourselves eligible for campus placements and recruitments (of course, only those that passed all the previous sems wholly). We, the guys of the Mechanical branch, knowing well that this wouldn't bring us any good, paid anyway. Such placements bring in the jobs for students of the IT, CSE, ECE, and EEE branches only. The jobs open for Mechanical freshers are just a handful and far spaced in between. Such companies visit just the top-two colleges in town; and ours, being a new college, that too, a self-financed one, and we being the first batch . . . the odds were against us.

I signed up anyway. It was a decision made with no thinking whatsoever. The only reason I found in favour of me doing so was the experience of attending a recruitment drive which included the presentation, the aptitude test, the interview, and the like.

The first company arrived - . . . - wait for it - . . . - Satyam Computers! It was a fun outing for the Mechanical guys. We thoroughly enjoyed the experience (special mention Bini, bus-ride). The aptitude test . . . the first one we came across, unlike the students of the other branches who came prepared, was somethin. At a later point of time, I came to know that the cut-off was 6 right answers, and I had attempted just 7 or 8, knowing well that there wasn't any negatives. Later in the day, when they announced the names of those who made it, my name was also called, along with around 10 other guys from my class. Unfortunately, our interviews, which was all we needed to clear to get the job, was scheduled for the following day.

It was disappointing, because the venue for this drive was some 20 kms away, and we had a slight transport-problem, which we sorted out in time (special mention Alen, his car). We were busy reading the day's news to prepare ourselves for the interview. Kindly note, we were then still not bothered about the significance of the job we have come so close to getting. There were five interview-panels. Most of our guys were called to panel 5. The interviewer was a nice man - all he asked were questions relating to self, history, background, parents' jobs, ambitions for self, ambitons as a Satyamite, and the like. We had come across several others who were asked questions on C, java, and other computer and electronics stuff we had no clue of. Also, there was another interviewer who asked questions we (Mechs) should know (to answer); fortunately, we were not sent to him. At the end of the day, we were informed that more than half of the selected guys from my class were offered jobs, and I was one among them. It was a special and cool feeling. We were then subjected to a session that dealt with the terms and conditions and other related stuff about joining and the like. It was boring.

But still, it was exciting coz, we just wanted to go and have fun and experience how it felt to participate in the thing. There were other companies too that came over the next few months, but luck didn't shine on most of us (including me).

February was also the month when I began wondering about my final semester project, where it could be done, what is to be done, how will it be done, who will it be done alongwith, and the like. I had got an application form for project-work at VSSC from Renosh (my senior). But, it had an eligibility criteria - the minimum average of the group doing the project should be 75% (i guess that's the value). That was something we wouldn't satisfy. So we had to forget about it.

Also, this was the time I had begun correspondence with few people I know to get some info on my new-found inclination to the aerospace-field and associated job-opportunities. I had contacted Samji-uncle (Dubai) and cous-Vinod (Florida) to help me out with various doubts I had. They were very kind and had replied back to all of my queries. It helped form my earliest opinions and thoughts about the field and the decisions I was going to take since.

Classes were going well. We had few new members of the teaching staff (special mention, Rajesh sir, Sreekanth sir; i guess that's it). HMT was a great subject to learn, thanks to Rajesh sir for that.

I can't seem to remember any other event worth mentioning. The me-too-got-a-job was certainly the highlight. (At least then, and for some time since)

Wow! nearly forgot . . .

My attending Maramon Convention 2008, the 113th edition of the largest gathering of Christians at Maramon. It was the second-last day of the convention, a Saturday. Sanichachan had dropped me at the station and he made his journey on Anupam's bike, to return it to his home in Chenganoor. I got down at Chenganoor and had breakfast there along with few relatives (Dada's side) and then we took a bus to Maramon. I attended the songs-session, the intercessory prayer session, and the pre-noon talk (message). It was delivered by white man, guess a Briton or Australian. I remember well what the message was. It was about resisting the temptations of the evil powers and leading a good life. Similar to the case of the lotus, which being a pretty flower lies amidst a not-so-pretty pond and not being overcome by it. The more befitting example he adopted was that of the aeroplane (likened to ourselves) and how it overcomes the tremendous force of the earth's downward pull, gravity (sinful nature, temptations of the evil one), and successfully flies away. I found that very powerful. He brought out in few, but precise, words the significance of the will to overcome temptations to lead a good life pleasing God. I feel bad I don't know his name.

Following the session, I found Sanichachan, and we strolled through the stalls and made few purchases. I bought myself a Bible, KJV, because i was told to switch from the GNB. After that, Sanichachan and I started our search for a place to eat. We were tired and hungry. The sunny-ness certainly didn't help our cause, as we got increasingly fatigued. After much wandering we found a place, which we wouldn't consider in another situation (it was a bar, but a decent one) but went in anyway, because it had AC and there didn't seem to be any other place around. The food turned out to be alright, afterall we were terribly hungry. We then returned the bike, and the Achen (at whose house we returned the bike) dropped us off at Chenganoor railway station. We got the train some time later and returned home at night. It was quite an experience. We then decided to not attend the convention henceforth, because of the heat and the lack of good places to eat nearby.

Tough beginning to year 2008

New year's eve, i arrive Trivandrum, (back from my Christmas break, a reunion with my family (which included Geo, my brother-in-law, the latest member in my family) in Dubai after a long while), in the morning and shortly after, i'm called to come for a wedding by the choir sec.y (i think, it was Dr. Rony, or choir treasurer, Beena aunty). In similar situations, I'm expected to play the keyboard, but on this unfortunate day, i was asked to sing instead, which was dissapointing.

Got back home from the sleepy wedding, totally tired, which i was already when i landed, and tried to get my study-preparations going. That was not going to be an easy procedure. I haven't had as tough a preparation for a sem exam as my fifth sem exams. The previous couple of days that i spent along with my family and my close pals in Dubai was more special than i thought it was. The loneliness i experienced was incredible. It took me around 20 days to get over my home-sickness. The joy and happiness that we shared among members of my family and friends was . . . awesome; it's not often we experience those feelings. In fact, it was our first gathering as the entire group in a long while. I found myself recollecting the fun times i spent with Dada, Amma, Geo, Resmi, the pals, Jinu, Muthu, Remya, Akhila, Hima, Alan, Jincy, and Reshma, and their families, in their homes (special mention of the unforgettable - yet greatly cherished - night with the gang in Jinu's room one of those nights). Anyway, it led to my poor performance in the exam and left a great deal to be desired.

Slowly and unknowingly i got over the loneliness and began afresh a new sem, the sixth semester, which began Jan-end. The marriage of a relative of mine (Sajuchan) helped in the process. We got to put up a small musical program at the reception, Anupam, Sanichachan, Anjuchechi, (was there Ann?), and I. It was a good outing. Things felt normal.

Soon after our classes began, there was a major incident at college. This was a big one. A fight broke out between a senior and the pre-final year students (which i represent). It was unprecedented, in terms of magnitude, intensity, and the like. What made it exciting was that it included guys from my class. And we got to closely watch how the events unfolded.

This is the beginning to a collection of my thoughts in the written word for the very first time. I sincerely hope to keep this going for a long time.

What i intend to do through this blog is to bring out the events that have occurred in my life a year ago; ie. as a beginning, i'll share the events that occurred in January 2008.

don't know how i'm gonna shape this up to be, but i'm earnestly looking forward to the experience.

I thought about 'the posting from a year ago' for quite sometime, and thought it's alright, coz that way i'll myself be able to recollect the various incidents that had occurred a year back.

One year back is the farthest, i guess, i can go. can't seem to go earlier.

Besides, one has a better perception of events at a later point in time than then, i believe.

So here's hoping to share the events of my life from a year ago.